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命題Essay教室里的活動只是體現了你真實個體的一部分

2013年02月21日來源:美國留學網作者: 萬佳留學
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[Prompt: What you do in the classroom defines only a part of who you are. How do you spend your time when you are not in class or studying?]

Landmark

I taught him something new.

“Eat” and “boat” were the only two words he knew, yet he said these two simple words with enthusiasm and passion. When he smiled, his hazel eyes glimmered with curious innocence and his lips curled in naïve playfulness: childish, but sincere. He laughed at the ordinary things in life -- a butterfly fluttering on a leaf, a ball rolling across the asphalt -- but his laughs always rang joyously, untainted by worry.

Nervous, but eager, I arrived for the Landmark program in Gilmanton Iron Works, New Hampshire, only to find Kory's outstretched arms ready for a bear hug. I looked at him, uneasy and hesitant. There he stood before me, all five-foot-nine of him, with a silly grin revealing two rows of crooked teeth. Immediately, I was astonished, repulsed, and a little frightened. He looked disheveled and dirty, yet he oozed innocent confidence. I had never interacted with the mentally challenged before, and I had no idea what to expect. I reluctantly took a step forward, into his extended arms, into a new world.

"Sam, " I tried to teach him, in hopes of throwing another shiny quarter into his bank of two words. He stared at me blankly, questioning the sounds that came out of my mouth. He slowly formed a bemused expression that seemed to indicate those quarters might never shine.

At first our time together was very awkward; I didn’t know what to say to him, and he didn’t have much to say to me. After the first day, however, I realized that, although Kory couldn’t converse, he enjoyed just listening to me and playing with me. In fact, after spending a week with Kory, my own communication skills improved markedly. I discovered the power of eye contact, facial expressions, and physical gestures. After we reached this understanding, our relationship progressed steadily. I found him easy to trust, and he began to trust me. He looked up to me and emulated my behavior.

Our relationship wasn’t without conflict, however. At times, he and I both became frustrated when we couldn’t understand each other. Especially trying were Kory’s frequent temper tantrums. These frenzies were nerve-racking because oftentimes I didn’t know why he was crying or how to make him stop. Yet Kory’s exasperation and wild emotions forced me to be a model of control. After a few of his fits, I realized that Kory just needed me to be calm while he released some frustration.
Kory and I experienced a week of ups and downs. We painted, canoed, and sang. I watched him giggle whimsically and throw aggressive fits. Before I went to Landmark, I would have shrunk away, fearful of this mysterious boy. After that week, however, I looked at him fondly and with a new understanding.

On the last day, I stood in the driveway of the camp waiting for my ride to the airport. There he stood before me, all five-foot-nine of him, with that silly grin and outstretched arms, ready for a bear hug. I approached him, this time without hesitation. When we pulled back, we both had watery eyes.

I taught him something new, but in the end, he taught me so much more.

評論:

文章繪聲繪色的講述了作者自己與一個殘障人士在一周之內發生的事情。在這段時間內,無論智障孩子的純真的微笑,還是狂躁的脾氣,作者都為我們進行了描述。他們一起生活,一起游戲,一起唱歌,這一切一切都令讀者感受到了溫馨的感覺。僅僅從文筆上來講,就可以稱作是一篇好的文章。況且并非僅僅是這樣。

在文章開始的時候,僅僅是通過對智障孩子的外貌描寫,我們就能看出來作者有“愛心”,然后再通篇的描述中,這種“愛心”與“耐心”完美的結合了起來。這些都是作者想要表達給這篇ESSAY的審查者的。

而在最后的一句話:I taught him something new, but in the end, he taught me so much more,可以說是文章的點睛之筆。他的不僅僅是提醒閱讀者自己所具有的優點:愛心以及耐心,更重要的是對這種純真的感情進行了烘托。付出了很多,得到了什么?得到的是真摯的情感,我想作者真正想說的,應該是只要真心的付出,就一定會得到真摯的回報這個觀點。

總結:

文章緊扣題目要求,在敘述以及抒情的同時都在向閱讀者表述自己通過這件事情能夠體現出來的品質以及能力。可以說是這種以情感敘述為主體的文章中的成功之作。

譯文:

我和Landmark相處的日子

我教了他一些新東西。

“吃”和“船”是他所知道的唯一兩個詞,但是他還是津津有味的念叨著他們。他笑的時候,淡褐色的眼睛里充滿著好奇、天真,小嘴唇玩耍式的卷起來:稚嫩但是真誠。他為生活中的一些平常的事情發笑:揮舞著翅膀的蝴蝶,一顆滾著穿過瀝青馬路的球,但是那笑聲里永遠都沒有憂愁,充滿著喜悅。

為了一個體驗,我懷著急切,期盼的心情來到新罕布什爾的Gilmanton Iron Works,卻只看到張開雙臂想要一個擁抱的Kory。我看著他,有些局促猶豫。他站在我面前,只有五英尺九那么高,傻笑著,露出兩排扭曲變形的牙齒。一瞬間,我感到震驚、反感、還有一絲的害怕。他看起來臟兮兮的,滿身凌亂不堪,但是從他身上還是可以看到一點天真的自信。我之前從來沒有過這樣的心靈挑戰,我不情愿的向前邁勒了一步,在他的雙臂中我又找到一個新的世界。

“山姆”,我試著打破 一直以來只懂兩個詞這個界限。她茫然的看著我,對這個從我嘴里發出的聲音充滿疑問。慢慢的,他顯現出困惑的表情,好像預示著這些音節對于他永遠都不會有什么吸引力。

起初,我們在一起的時光顯得特別不默契,我不知道該對他說什么,他也沒有多少話要對我說。但是一天之后,我發現,雖然Kory不能交談,但是她喜歡聽我說話、和我一起玩。事實上,與Kory呆了一周之后,我與人溝通的能力有了不小的進步。我發現了眼神交流、面部表情和肢體語言的力量。在我們相互了解之后,我們的感情不斷的加深。我發現他很容易相信別人,并且開始相信我。他很崇拜我,而且總會模仿我的一些舉動。

然而,我們之間的相處也不是沒有沖突的。好幾次由于無法溝通,我和他都很受打擊。最煩人的是Kory不斷的發脾氣。這種狂怒是對精神的一種折磨,因為大多數時間我都不明白他為什么要哭、怎么才能叫他停下來。Kory的發怒也讓我成為了一個典型的控制者。他如是發作了幾次之后我發現Kory只是需要我在他發怒的時候保持平靜。

我和Kory就這樣相處了一周。我們一起畫畫、劃船、唱歌。我看著發出古怪的笑,看著他那激烈的脾氣發作。在去Landmark之前,看到這個市的男孩一定會被嚇得跑掉的。然而那一周之后,我就可以開心的以一種新的理解來看他了。

最后一天,我在營地旁邊的馬路等車去機場。他就站在我旁邊,只有五英尺九那么高,帶著那種傻笑,張開雙臂,等一個大大的擁抱。我走近他,這次,沒有猶豫。放開彼此,我們都看到了對方眼角的淚光。

我教了他一些新的東西,但是最后,他教給了我更多。

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